Settling a child with SEN back into school

Every child is different, but there are some common areas that can pose difficulties as children with SEN prepare for the return to school and tackle the first few weeks of term. 

Stresses about returning to school – whether at the end of the holidays or once they’ve started back – can play out in children’s behaviour at home, for example:

• Meltdowns
• Shutdowns
• Shouting, screaming and physical violence
• Increase in obsessions
• Regression in toileting and other self-care
• Sleep problems, particularly getting to sleep
• Inability to comply with demands and requests 

 As the return to school approaches, there’s a lot you can do to ease your child’s distress and prepare them for going back into the classroom.

Talk to your child about what to expect

It’s important that your child knows as much as possible about what it’ll be like to go back to school and has a chance to express any worries, so make time for relaxed conversations.
 
‘It doesn’t have to be a big sit-down talk; in fact, it’s better to have these conversations while you’re doing something else, like driving the car, drawing, baking, or even playing computer games,’ Dr Brown advises.
 
‘Keeping it low-key, without eye contact, is likely to help them open up more, and you can encourage this by asking subtle questions; “I know the classroom is sometimes very noisy. Do you know what to do if you need a break?”’

Prepare them for new faces and places

Try to get hold of photos of your child’s new teachers, classroom and wider school environment to familiarise them with what they’ll be going back to.
 
You may be able to find some of these on the school’s website, or you could ask the school to provide them (ideally, do this at the end of the summer term so there’s plenty of time to prepare).
 
‘You can then put together Social Stories [short descriptions, with words and pictures, showing children what to expect] and show them to your child to familiarise them with their new teacher, where they hang their coat, and so on,’ says Dr Brown.

Arrange a visit

In most schools, at least some members of staff will be in school at the end of the holidays, just before the start of term, so ask if you and your child can pop in for a visit.
 
‘This means they can reacquaint themselves with the school environment, and you can make sure they know about places like quiet rooms where they can go if they’re struggling in class,’ Dr Brown explains.

Talk to their teacher and/or SENCO (special educational needs coordinator)

The more the staff know about your child, the better, so arrange a meeting so you can explain their needs and what the school can do to make things easier.
 
‘You can talk to them about the things your child is likely to struggle with, such as classroom noise, understanding instructions or coping with the social side of break time, and discuss what they could do to help, for example giving them movement breaks by handing out books, letting them use a fidget toy in class, or letting them have time out in a quiet space,’ says Dr Brown.
 
This is also your chance to talk through your child’s Individual Education Plan (IEP) or Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP) to make sure everyone involved in their school experience understands what they need to succeed.

Practise putting on uniform

‘Children with sensory issues sometimes find wearing school uniform physically uncomfortable, so it’s a good idea to practise putting it on over the space of a few days, one item at a time, aiming for them to be able to wear the whole uniform by September,’ Dr Brown explains.
 
‘It’s also reasonable to ask their school if they can adapt the uniform to make it easier for your child to wear, for example by wearing black trainers rather than school shoes, or not wearing a tie.’

Involve them in decisions

Simply letting your child be involved in choosing their stationery or lunch box gives them some control over a situation that might feel unmanageable.

Use visual timetables

Visual timetables are pictorial representations of what to expect during the school day and when (lining up to go into class, taking the register, reading time, etc), and can be helpful for the many SEN children who need to know what’s happening and when.
 
‘It’s important that these are kept up to date, though, as leaving a three-day-old timetable on the wall and not following it can be more distressing,’ says Dr Brown.

Expect challenging behaviour at home

‘Many children are very good at masking their distress at school, but then have to let it all out when they get home,’ Dr Brown explains.
 
Although it can be difficult for the whole family, try to cut your child some slack if they’re having meltdowns or shutdowns at home. Often, it only takes one small thing, completely unrelated to school, to light the touch paper.
 
‘Remember that the behaviour often happens because of a build-up of anxiety, thoughts and feelings which we have to work through with the individual child,’ Dr Brown adds. ‘Even with a child who can verbalise their difficulties, we have to be detectives, trying to piece the evidence together in order to help them and us to understand what is happening.’

Keep talking

To your child, their teacher, their SENCO, their specialist: anyone and everyone who has an influence on their school experience.
 
It’s not at all unusual for your child to struggle to settle back into school, and sometimes, problems crop up that no one expected, but by keeping the lines of communication open, and being prepared to try new things if what you’re doing isn’t working, you can smooth the path and make school as positive an experience as possible for your child.